just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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