Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
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