Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
