Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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