so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
