The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
