i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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