Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
