Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?

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(312): I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night? http://tfl.nu/ityh

Replies (2) Good night (659) Bad night (1508)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again

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(215): I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again http://tfl.nu/3rrj

Replies (7) Good night (1253) Bad night (3112)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.

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(201): He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college. http://tfl.nu/379h

Replies (44) Good night (4255) Bad night (778)
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(818): View more from California

Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.

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(818): Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical. http://tfl.nu/onyl

Replies (42) Good night (10418) Bad night (2114)
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(415): View more from California

Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?

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(415): Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide? http://tfl.nu/adm7

Replies (15) Good night (2618) Bad night (1210)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.

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(651): No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep. http://tfl.nu/9hze

Replies (8) Good night (2421) Bad night (787)
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(512): View more from Texas

Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool

(210): View more from Texas

No

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(512): Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool (210): No http://tfl.nu/m5ry

Replies (4) Good night (2080) Bad night (669)
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(510): View more from California

I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.

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(510): I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter. http://tfl.nu/hgbg

Replies (13) Good night (768) Bad night (1854)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

We don't really communicate like that.

(781): View more from Massachusetts

Communicate like what?

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.

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(617): We don't really communicate like that. (781): Communicate like what? (617): Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants. http://tfl.nu/kuit

Replies (3) Good night (1780) Bad night (699)
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(415): View more from California

I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.

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(415): I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy. http://tfl.nu/udyo

Replies (6) Good night (1474) Bad night (872)
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(817): View more from Texas

I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.

(512): View more from Texas

Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.

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(817): I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night. (512): Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there. http://tfl.nu/r01e

Replies (4) Good night (2152) Bad night (554)
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(410): View more from Maryland

Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.

(443): View more from Maryland

*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for

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(410): Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something. (443): *jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for http://tfl.nu/ud0q

Replies (4) Good night (1591) Bad night (575)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink

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(402): I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink http://tfl.nu/3wto

Replies (8) Good night (1027) Bad night (437)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?

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(717): there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right? http://tfl.nu/jd9g

Replies (2) Good night (868) Bad night (388)
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(408): View more from California

Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain

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(408): Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain http://tfl.nu/bezg

Replies (2) Good night (828) Bad night (405)

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