You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
