Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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