I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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