Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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