My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
We don't watch enough power rangers
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
