this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
