I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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