I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
