windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
