Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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