PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
