Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
