I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
