So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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