I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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