It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Randomize