Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(425): View more from Washington

Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.

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(519): View more from Ontario

i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??

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(845): View more from New York

It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?

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(330): View more from Ohio

Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.

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(817): View more from Texas

The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it

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(507): View more from Minnesota

I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"

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(510): View more from California

Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?

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