I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
