Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
