Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
foreskin is a definite game changer
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
