all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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