I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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