Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
