I don't think brook has ever known best
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
