you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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