we're blogging at a bar
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
