Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
This toilet bowl is my home.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
