Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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