I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
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I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
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I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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