I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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