All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize