White coat. Heels.
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
