i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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