It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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