I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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