Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are