is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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