check it out our google latitudes are spooning
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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