week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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