hotel room ftw
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS