i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
